People are not permanent press. “Permanent press is the term given to a characteristic of fabric that has been chemically processed to resist wrinkles and hold its shape. Alternative terms include wrinkle resistant, wash and wear, no-iron, durable press, and easy care. This treatment has a lasting effect on the fabric.” (Wikipedia.)
People are not wrinkle resistant. They have not been chemically altered. They are not wash and wear or no iron or durable press and least of all easy care. Then why do we want them to be? Why do I want me to be?
The alternatives to permanent press fabrics are silk, cotton, wool and linen. These natural fibers are prone to wrinkles but as a seamstress I know how lushishly delicious they can be. I prefer working with silk over nylon, cotton over acetate and wool or linen over polyester. Naturally fibers tend to mold much better to the touch than permanent press and they feel so real to the fingertips. Yes, they are more delicate, easily overworked, sensitive to my rough handling – just as we natural humans are delicate, easily overworked and sensitive to the touch. But we too are moldable.
We can and do change.
We take shape in the Master’s hand.
And…we are not permanent press. We are not wrinkle resistant and that is okay. I radically accept this. Just because man can create the “ideal” chemically altered fibers to save us the work of ironing does not mean that we can create chemically altered people to save the human race the work of living and growing and loving and hurting.
We are not permanent press and we never will be. Stop dreaming of a perfect world where you never have to be vulnerable. You are vulnerable. It is your nature. There is nothing to fear from your wrinkles.
Things can be ironed out. Things are not so bad that you cannot love and be loved, work and be appreciated, laugh and be funny. Remember your sister is silk, she is delicate. Your co-worker is linen, he can be stiff. Your son is cotton, he can be torn. You are wool, you are durable, dependable, warm and a little bit scratchy.
None of you are permanent press. Life – people – are full of wrinkles and a little messy but, oh so lushishly delicious in the Master’s hand.
If you have a daughter struggling, or feel like you are personally struggling, we can help. Our Daughters of Light program is for you. Please call to schedule a consultation with a therapist. We can help determine what the best steps would be and how to help. Call 801-989-1023 or email firstname.lastname@example.org. We offer both in-person and online counseling options.
Aneladee Milne, CMHC Intern, has been working with women and adolescent girls for over 10 years. She specializes in working with those that struggle with anxiety and depression and the often unwanted behaviors that are associated with those mental health concerns.